The Wisdom to Avoid the Wrong Woman

An entire chapter in Proverbs is dedicated to warning the young son against taking the path toward the adulteress. For certain, sexual temptation is always present in our lives but especially when we are young. The physiological realities of our 20-30's are common and so this passage written to young men is vitally important.

Let us also consider that this struggle is common to both sexes but in general and throughout history, men have succumbed more often to the temptation of illicit sex.

What do we need to know about the forbidden woman? 

First, she is a flirt. Her words are "honey". She flatters and taps into the ego of the man.

Proverbs 5:1–6 (ESV) My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding, 2 that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge. 3 For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, 4 but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol; 6 she does not ponder the path of life; her ways wander, and she does not know it.

Second, we learn that she will sap a man of all that he has going for him:

Proverbs 5:8–11 (ESV) Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house, 9 lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless, 10 lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner, 11 and at the end of your life you groan, when your flesh and body are consumed,

That phrase, "your years to the merciless" ring true. How many men have been judged and lived in shame for years because of adultery! The men I know that succumb have all ended up far from the heights of their lives. Cast down in the place of groaning and weakness. 

Now the writer here is not simply warning against the adulterous woman, but also encouraging the man to rejoice in his wife. This is an important teaching. Scripture is not just a list of what not to do, or what to avoid. Scripture points us to the path of life. 

Proverbs 5:15–17 (ESV) Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. 16 Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? 17 Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you.

Then a repeated word in the next verses gives us a huge key to experiencing sexual joy in marriage:

Proverbs 5:18–20 (ESV) Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the wife of your youth, 19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. 20 Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress?

The word for "intoxicated" is the Hebrew, "tisgeh". Which can also mean, "to be led astray." That is, there are two radically different sexual desires that men choose from. One from the adulterer and the other from his own wife. Both of these desires will lead us and even take over our lives. The key is to feed the proper desire and not entertain the sinful one. 

The same is true spiritually. We can give our lives to God alone in Christ Jesus or be drawn away by the loves of this world. One or the other will intoxicate us. Praying for you to be saturated in Him.