The Wrong Kind of Relationship with God will Cost you Many Others

There's a danger to not understanding the grace of God. Jephthah is exhibit "A". His fear of an unsuccessful war led him to bargain with God for victory.

Judges 11:30–31 (ESV) And Jephthah made a vow to the LORD and said, “If you will give the Ammonites into my hand, 31 then whatever comes out from the doors of my house to meet me when I return in peace from the Ammonites shall be the LORD’s, and I will offer it up for a burnt offering.”

It was a needless bargain for Jephthah. He already had something from God far more valuable than any military success. Note how his military campaign begins:

Judges 11:29 (ESV) Then the Spirit of the LORD was upon Jephthah,...

Jephthah was anointed but sadly it wasn't enough for him. He wanted a self-centered guarantee that God would give him victory. He feigned good religious practice to garner divine intervention. Many Americans do the same exact thing every day. 

His story reveals the danger of a relationship with God based on your performance. After his vow is made and the victory is won he returns home to find his daughter running out to meet him:

Judges 11:35–36 (ESV) And as soon as he saw her, he tore his clothes and said, “Alas, my daughter! You have brought me very low, and you have become the cause of great trouble to me. For I have opened my mouth to the Lord, and I cannot take back my vow.” 36 And she said to him, “My father, you have opened your mouth to the Lord; do to me according to what has gone out of your mouth, now that the Lord has avenged you on your enemies, on the Ammonites.”

Judges 11:39 (ESV) And at the end of two months, she returned to her father, who did with her according to his vow that he had made. She had never known a man, and it became a custom in Israel

The fact that Jephthah follows through with sacrificing his child betrays not only his lack of understanding of God's grace but also his ignorance of God's Word. If only Jephthah had read the book of Deuteronomy he would have found a Bible-based OUT for his foolish vow.
Deuteronomy 12:31 (ESV) You shall not worship the Lord your God in that way, for every abominable thing that the Lord hates they have done for their gods, for they even burn their sons and their daughters in the fire to their gods.

The fact that he didn't know how God felt about child sacrifice betrays the cultural accommodations resident in his heart. Child sacrifice was a pagan practice the nations around Israel used to garner assurance of military victory, agricultural success or some other national hope from their "gods".

So we see that old problem from Judges 1 of not driving out the nations in the first place bringing pagan influence upon even the leaders of Israel. Jephthah was far more like the nations around him than living out the distinctive calling God has placed upon him.

This is the danger of the American church. When we adopt the values and aspirations of our culture without considering what God has to say, we end up bearing the cost ourselves. When we forget how God has chosen to reveal Himself to us in His sovereign grace we will fall into the same traps nonbelievers find themselves in whenever life isn't going as planned or difficulties arise. 

Child of God, you are saved by grace through faith. And this FAITH is God's gift to you. So what good thing will He who saved you ever withhold from you? Yes, there is suffering, but even the suffering is a sign of God's calling and election over your life (see 2 Thessalonians 1:5). Yes, there is trouble, we struck down but we will not be destroyed (2 Cor 4:9). 

The right kind of relationship with God will empower you no matter what challenges you. The wrong kind will cause you to revert to pagan instincts of appeasing some "god" in the sky who doesn't actually exist. There is a benefit to holiness and this is it - you are separated from religious works and sanctified into a holy relationship with your Father who loves you. 

Live like it's true because it is.